The Academy Awards

OK everyone! it's time for my Oscar review. I know it's a day late but hey, hopefully it is worth it. I know I haven't posted in a few days but I hope my loyal following will forgive me.

OK let's start off with best dressed. I know I am going to get crap for this but I don't care. I am naming Kate Winslet (pictured above) best dressed. The gorgeous slate and black dress, the flawless hair and jewels and the way she just "is". She was pure Hollywood at its very best. Brava!

Now on to worst dressed. Jessica Biel (pictured above). Oh Jessica. Were you running late, dear? Is that why you insisted on grabbing a clip and a bed sheet and "making it work"? Well, you didn't. You look like hell and I'm not going to take it anymore. Were there uglier dresses there? Yes. Why are you the worst dressed? Because you know better. Moving on.

Now for THE red carpet moment. While being interviewed Vanessa Hudgens (pictured above) said she felt like a young Audrey Hepburn. Hey, Nessa, come here honey. Here's the deal. The day Audrey Hepburn disgraces herself, her family and the company she works for by having her bush plastered all over the internet, we can talk about comparing you to old Hollywood. Until then, just stand there and smile. K? Thanks.

Finally, a red carpet shout out to David Bowie (pictured above). Although I'm not a big fan of his outfit, I do admire his bold choices.

Now on to the show. Based on the post-show reactions I've seen, my opinion that Hugh Jackman's musical numbers were boring, old time and self-indulgent is not a popular one. You're not that great, Hugh. Not even Beyonce or her rumored nip-slip (I didn't catch it) could save the 2nd musical number...

De Nada. I guess.

Go away. Fuck.

Funny

Not Funny

Aside from the Mickey Rourke crap at the end, I thought Sean Penn's Best Actor acceptance speech was heartfelt and thought provoking. Here's the video in case you missed it. Um. On a side note. Please pause the video at exactly 55 seconds. Now look behind the blond writer guy. OK. WTF IS THAT?!?!?! Holy Shit! That guy would have no problem biting an apple through a picket fence. How did he get into the Oscars? Is Angelina trying to adopt one of his kids? This just about ruined my night.

Then Slumdog Millionaire won best picture.

That is all.